Christians, Hypocrisy and Tolerance
YOU: (a text – no intonation, cadence, volume, facial expressions, or body language) I don’t know if you honestly intended for me to read it or were just writing one of those mad texts that you meant to delete, but hit Send instead. Ooops!
“I don’t want to talk about religion with you because I have always felt judgment, condescension, and guilt are the main themes and something you take upon yourself to do to me and others. I’m pretty sure that’s God’s job, but most Christians that I know, including you, make those the central themes of their interactions with other human beings. It’s hypocritical and intolerable to be around.
I have god in my life. I have no problem with Christianity. However I can hardly stand other Christians.
Most seem to get so busy casting stones that they conflate themselves with an actual moral authority and then are justified in their own head to hand out judgment upon everyone else. It’s so backwards and broken and spiritually corrupt that I simply don’t want to engage in conversation about it when it’s more often than not a trap that will be used against me – to make me feel bad and the other person good about themselves.”
ME: (An unsent letter. A real (not fake) answer to your text because you told me last time we were together you wanted me to be silent. For the last two weeks or more I have had feelings of being humbled, angry, bitter, cutoff, disengaged, dismissive, in disbelief, dismayed, hurt, mourning, reeling, tired, rejected and repulsed – and of course, you do not have to take on my emotions. But I could use a little empathy or compassion as a fellow human being.)
I am truly sorry that you have been or are feeling belittled, guilty, and judged. However I do not take ownership of what you think or feel about what I say; not to be coldblooded. To be kindly truthful, your feelings and thoughts are your own because you are a separate person. Maybe you would agree that in our dialogues or debates I do not really have the power of persuasion. So you see, I do not believe that I possess as much power to influence your thoughts and emotions as you give me credit for.
I can promise to stop talking to you about religion.
I cannot promise that I will stop talking to you through the filter of my relationship with the trinitarian God (aka the Father, the Lord Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit); what you called underlying themes. To do so would be hypocritical of me, i.e. I would be saying one thing and at the core thinking/feeling/doing something else.
You say you “can hardly stand other Christians.” You told me being direct is the way you choose to communicate. There’s not much wiggle room in the meaning of that very direct statement. Your intolerance towards me has been leaking out for a while. I can hear it in the tone of your voice, the hammering of your words and the many times you have interrupted and silenced me.
To most Christians saying they are being hypocritical is a hurtful and offensive statement. It is a nightmare come true for me. I stand judged. What do you expect? I feel hurt and offended!! Sounds to me like your tolerance is limited to people practicing religions other than Christianity. Please hear me and try this – substitute Christian with Buddhist, Catholic, Hindu, Jew, Muslim, New Age, Orthodox or Taoist in your statement.
It is written that others will know that we are Christians by our love and our unity. After all the multitude of denominations, why be further divided between practicing and non-practicing Christians? This does not fit who you are.
On the other hand, you are right. What I have read and experienced is that the person of the Holy Spirit is the One who convicts and it can feel overwhelming when it’s happening all the time. He speaks directly sometimes (or through visions and dreams); more often he uses His Word; circumstances and the people in our lives for this. According to the synoptic Gospels and Revelation, the Lord Jesus Christ will be the One judging on “That Day.” In addition, all Christians have received the Holy Spirit. Paul writes in Timothy that as fellow believers we are all called to use the Word to teach, exhort and rebuke in order to train each other in righteousness – as iron sharpens iron.
Forgive me for the times you have experienced judgment from me instead of a desire to protect you, grace, gratitude and forgiveness. I do have a negative and judgmental streak. Most of the time my intentions have been to help you grow you into all you were made to be (with your input of course). I am sincerely sorry for the times my motives were sometimes mixed and my attempts were flawed. Please forgive me.
The Good News is that He factored for all our failures. He decided to make a way to be fair and forgiving at the same time despite the fact that He knew all the things we would do. He exists outside of time you know. Our just God who is Love and Light; in His kindness, love, and infinite mercy decided to remove our guilt through the death of His Son, the risen Savior. We stand in-Christ in the “already, but not yet” redeemed state. We are being transformed into the likeness of Christ by the Holy Spirit’s work.
All power, praise, glory and honor belong to our God – as he is known in the Messianic prophecy read at Christmas time . . . and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9.6 – English Standard Version Translation)
I know I am sounding preachy now. I get it. Mums the word. For awhile.
I still love you and always will. Just don’t like you very much at the moment.
